There was a time when I didn’t know where I fit in the world. I wore a thousand masks trying to become whoever I thought people needed me to be, but I never felt comfortable in my own skin. I chased external validation, escaped through substances, and spiraled deeper into a life run by fear, shame, and the illusion of control. I was selfish, not in the sense of self-care, but in the way of survival. I was self-centered because I didn’t know any other way to live. The only world I knew revolved around my pain.
It wasn’t until I hit proverbial rock bottom that everything began to shift. When I came to the end of myself, I found something greater than me waiting—something that didn’t require me to have all the answers. It was in that surrender that the true victory began. Recovery taught me that I had never really learned how to love myself, and that selflessness doesn’t mean abandoning yourself, it begins with self-love.
The miracle happened slowly, in rooms filled with other addicts and alcoholics, where pain met purpose and healing began with honesty. One of the most transformative lessons I’ve learned is this: if I want to keep what I’ve been given, I have to give it away. Being of service saved my life. Pouring into others, sharing my experience, my resources, strength, and hope—these things are what anchor me when my own life feels unsteady.
Today, I can comprehend the word serenity. I know peace—not the kind that comes and goes, but the kind that stays rooted in purpose. And I’ve learned that the only way to truly keep that peace… is to give it away.
For my family, their PAL group was a life raft in the storm. It provided support, guidance, and understanding at a time when we all felt lost. That is why we now volunteer and support PAL, not only as a way of saying thank you—but as a part of our healing. It’s a privilege to pour into the very source that poured into us.
If you’ve been helped by others, I invite you to consider how you can give back as part of that process of healing. Whether it’s through service, sharing your story, or your resources, it is together that we provide that lifeline for others going through the storm. Purpose is found in the pouring. Healing is found in the giving of ourselves.
And hope? Hope is found right here. One story, one family, one life at a time. A life that looks like the one I never dreamed my family and I could have today.
-Jamie, In Recovery
