Pushing through life’s struggles despite the pain

Pushing through life’s struggles despite the pain

​​​ I’ve been talking a lot lately. To alcoholics, addicts, homeless people, neighbors, co-workers, family, friends, people I don’t know and people I know well. Sometimes I over share or volunteer things about myself that are pretty raw and occasionally unhinged, but...
Be thankful for how you learned life’s lessons

Be thankful for how you learned life’s lessons

​​​ I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life. I’ve consistently been stubborn and obstinate when it comes to learning lessons and taking advice; there is something innate in my personality that tends to balk at suggestion, a burning desire to experience...
I deserve what’s best for me

I deserve what’s best for me

​​​​  “We only want what’s best for you.” I remember hearing this phrase from my parents at 19 years old. It was the beginning of my battle with substance use disorder and mental health issues. Sitting in a hospital room after my first overdose on heroin, I truly...
Embracing the here and now

Embracing the here and now

​​​​   I’m writing this from the backseat of a Toyota Camry heading west on the I-10. Swaths of open desert painted green with brush, wildflowers dotting the freeway margins, with random bursts of brilliant yellow and purple, create a picturesque landscape. My...
The future is bright

The future is bright

​​​​   I’m sitting on a filthy curb of a strip mall. Scabs line my face. The crooks of my arms are swollen with sores. Fear and sadness burn in my chest in equal measure. I can’t think about anything anymore unless it involves eliminating my thinking with heroin....
Falling down is inevitable, staying there is not

Falling down is inevitable, staying there is not

​​​​   The greatest achievements and accomplishments I’ve experienced have come at the cost of what felt like endless discomfort. Despite the insight I’ve gained over the years into this phenomenon, I still manage to occasionally lose sight and direction in the...